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Forgiving What You Can’t Forget: Discover How to Move On, Make Peace with Painful Memories, and Create a Life That’s Beautiful Again

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#1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER

You deserve to stop suffering because of what other people have done to you.

Have you ever felt stuck in a cycle of unresolved pain, playing offenses over and over in your mind? You know you can’t go on like this, but you don’t know what to do next. Lysa TerKeurst has wrestled through this journey. But in surprising ways, she’s discovered how to let go of bound-up resentment and overcome the resistance to forgiving people who aren’t willing to make things right.

In Forgiving What You Can’t Forget, Lysa’s deep empathy, therapeutic insight, and rich Bible teaching, coming out of more than 1,000 hours of theological study, will help you:

Learn how to move on when the other person refuses to change and never says they’re sorry.Walk through a step-by-step process to free yourself from the hurt of your past and feel less offended today.Discover what the Bible really says about forgiveness and the peace that comes from living it out right now.Identify what’s stealing trust and vulnerability from your relationships so you can believe there is still good ahead.Disempower the triggers hijacking your emotions by embracing the two necessary parts of forgiveness.

If you are ready to begin the process of healing and moving forward, Lysa has some words of comfort and encouragement for you as you begin the journey:

“Dear friend, I understand, deeply and personally, how hard it is when someone does something unchangeable that also feels unforgivable. I’ve cried countless tears and wrestled through so many questions.

If you can relate, you’re in the right place. Within these pages, your heart will be tenderly held. Your thoughts don’t need to be edited. Your resistance is understood. But there are some biblical perspectives to consider that have finally brought peace into my life. And I want the same for you.

And if no one else has ever said they’re sorry for your deep pain, I will. My heart breaks for what breaks so many of us. So, let me take your hand and lead you through how forgiveness is not only possible but is one of the most healing decisions to embrace.”

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Lysa deeply understands the heartache that comes with life-shattering circumstances. But she’s also discovered that our hardships can be the divine appointments our souls need to radically encounter God.

Filled with Biblical truth, gut-honest vulnerability, and refreshing wit, Lysa’s words will help you find redemption in every part of your story.

Publisher ‏ : ‎ Thomas Nelson
Publication date ‏ : ‎ November 17, 2020
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Print length ‏ : ‎ 288 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0718039874
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0718039875
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 1 pounds
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.8 x 0.92 x 8.64 inches
Best Sellers Rank: #1,674 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #3 in Christian Women’s Issues #21 in Christian Self Help #23 in Christian Personal Growth
Customer Reviews: 4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars (28,341) var dpAcrHasRegisteredArcLinkClickAction; P.when(‘A’, ‘ready’).execute(function(A) { if (dpAcrHasRegisteredArcLinkClickAction !== true) { dpAcrHasRegisteredArcLinkClickAction = true; A.declarative( ‘acrLink-click-metrics’, ‘click’, { “allowLinkDefault”: true }, function (event) { if (window.ue) { ue.count(“acrLinkClickCount”, (ue.count(“acrLinkClickCount”) || 0) + 1); } } ); } }); P.when(‘A’, ‘cf’).execute(function(A) { A.declarative(‘acrStarsLink-click-metrics’, ‘click’, { “allowLinkDefault” : true }, function(event){ if(window.ue) { ue.count(“acrStarsLinkWithPopoverClickCount”, (ue.count(“acrStarsLinkWithPopoverClickCount”) || 0) + 1); } }); });

10 reviews for Forgiving What You Can’t Forget: Discover How to Move On, Make Peace with Painful Memories, and Create a Life That’s Beautiful Again

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  1. Jary Payseno

    A book written with grace and truth from God
    I asked God how I could forgive a person who hasn’t said sorry. Weeks later, I stumbled upon this book while searching for books to strengthen my faith. I haven’t even finished this book yet but I felt called to tell others about how amazinginly well written it is. I am even underlining in pen the sentences that stand out to me the most and have the most power behind them. I can’t exactly express just how much truth and richness is in this book. It’s a message that teaches you to forgive others through the power of Christ without ignoring your feelings or even trying to make light of a horrible wrong. It is a gentle message without accusations and judgement and I truly find so much grace and truth in it just by turning to page 8. If you feel even the slightest pull, nudge or call to buy this book, then please do. I have faith that God lead me to it for a reason. God have all the glory and bless this lovely author.

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  2. Apps

    Loved it!
    When I first picked up Lysa TerKeurst’s “Forgiving What You Can’t Forget,” I wasn’t sure what to expect. The title alone felt like someone had reached into my chest and pulled out the exact thing I’d been wrestling with for years—that exhausting cycle of replaying hurt, nursing grudges, and wondering why forgiveness felt so impossible when the other person wasn’t even sorry.What struck me immediately was how honest TerKeurst is about the struggle. She doesn’t pretend forgiveness is simple or that you’ll wake up one day magically healed. Instead, she sits with you in the uncomfortable space where most of us actually live—stuck between knowing we should forgive and feeling absolutely justified in our anger. That’s refreshing.The book combines personal stories, theological depth (drawing from over 1,000 hours of study), and practical frameworks that actually feel doable. There’s real wisdom here about how to release bitterness even when the other person never apologizes, never changes, never makes it right. Because let’s be honest—that’s the scenario many of us are actually facing.What I appreciated most was the step-by-step process for working through hurt. It doesn’t feel preachy or oversimplified. It feels like someone who’s been there, who understands the weight of carrying resentment, offering you a genuine way out.The 4.7-star rating and nearly 30,000 reviews speak for themselves, but they don’t capture what makes this book special: it gives you permission to feel what you feel while also showing you there’s a path forward. That’s not easy to do, and TerKeurst does it with real grace.Who should read this? Anyone carrying the weight of unresolved hurt—whether it’s from a relationship, a betrayal, or a wound that never got acknowledged. It’s for people tired of the bitterness but unsure how to let it go.Retry

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  3. Amazon Customer

    Helped me heal and forgive
    I read Forgiving What You Can’t Forget in just a few days, it was that impactful. This book really opened my eyes to areas of forgiveness I still needed to work through after experiencing infidelity in a past relationship. It was honest, emotional, and incredibly insightful without feeling overwhelming. Overall, it’s a great book, and I would highly recommend it to anyone trying to heal, let go, and find a healthier path toward forgiveness.

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  4. Leigh T.

    Knowledgeable
    Wonderful insights

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  5. Melany iglesias

    Recommended
    This book is a powerful and emotional journey. Lysa TerKeurst writes with honesty and vulnerability, making it easy to connect with her words. She doesn’t offer quick fixes, but instead shares practical steps and spiritual insights that guide you through the process of forgiveness and healing.What I loved the most is how real and compassionate her voice feels—like a friend who understands your pain and gently points you toward freedom. It’s not just theory; it’s filled with relatable experiences and biblical wisdom that actually help you move forward.If you’re carrying hurt, betrayal, or just struggling to let go of the past, this book can be a turning point. It’s both comforting and challenging, and it reminded me that forgiveness is possible, even when it feels impossible.Highly recommended for anyone looking for hope, peace, and a new perspective on forgiveness.

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  6. Latoya Reisner

    This book is brilliant. Lysa writes almost from such a direct and personal point of view and beautifully brings in faith and religion in such a gentle way and as a reminder to teach you how to forgive. She teaches that forgiveness is very much a process AND an action and something we have to practice. She very much validate the pain you’ve been through. I’ve never connected to a book so much like this, and I’m now gonna be buying all her books. HIGHLY RECOMMEND. Even if you’re not a religious person – please trust this book. You’ll be in with it straight away

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  7. Matteo Oligarchi

    I concetti nel libro sono sicuramente validi ma sono troppo spesso supportati da riferimenti religiosi. La scrittrice utilizza esperienze personali per affrontare gli argomenti trattati. Mentre capisco che la religione si una elemento importante per la scrittrice non vedo la necessità di validare tutti gli argomenti attraverso riferimenti a Gesu e alla Bibbia. I concetti possono essere validi anche senza di essi.

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  8. Susan Barreau

    This is a brilliant book by the wonderful Lysa Terkeurst. Just one of the 25 best selling books she has written with incredible insight, compassion, love and true help for ANYONE struggling to forget the things that they feel they have forgiven, yet even decades later they STILL come up to bother us & steal our peace.Although Lysa is a Christian I truly believe this book will help anyone who is still struggling with the hurt & pain people have caused them in the past. I highly recommend it.

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  9. NinaPoe

    I am halfway through but already on the first pages and throughout the book I found so many inspiring statement and sections.Just going through an unexpected break up moving towards co-parenting I find it crucial to not fill myself up with anger, frustration and all those negative feelings. What Lysa is writing is so relatable and really helps me through, accepting and acknowledging the situation, the grief but not to add more pain.

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  10. Verna Parker

    Another amazing book by Lysa. So much amazing insight. Highly recommend

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    Forgiving What You Can’t Forget: Discover How to Move On, Make Peace with Painful Memories, and Create a Life That’s Beautiful Again
    Forgiving What You Can’t Forget: Discover How to Move On, Make Peace with Painful Memories, and Create a Life That’s Beautiful Again

    $15.71

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